Tired but Blessed

As we head towards the close out of another year, I think we all take a moment to pause and reflect. Think about the year and the ups and downs, the moments that made us laugh and ones that made us cry, the lessons we’ve learned, things we regret, and the milestones reached. The biggest milestone for us this year is the fact that Trevor has not had a hospital stay in 2019! This seems like a silly thing to be celebrating but when you’ve had 5 stays between May of 2017-Nov. of 2018, it’s a big deal. It’s something that before I had a special needs child, I never would have even considered much less celebrated. It was something I took for granted. I saw a post last week of a family whose newborn went down for a nap and she found him later not breathing. In her post she said something like, “this is something that happens to other people, not me.” I remember having that same thought when Trevor was diagnosed so I can totally sympathize with that feeling. Then another thought hit me. I still sort of have this mentality except now it’s more of a false sense of security with my other kids. They are not medically fragile and I’ve already faced the fear of losing a child so God wouldn’t require that of me with another child right? The more I thought about it the more I thought how wrong that mentality is. Job lost all his children in one day. I’ve had friends with healthy children that got an infection this year and ended up in the hospital for weeks, touch and go. I’ve heard stories of babies not waking up from naps this year. My grandfather fell and passed away a week later this year. You just never know what will happen or when. You never know how long each special person in your life will be there. Having a special needs child has opened my eyes to appreciating the day to day more and not taking things for granted and yet, I still have much work to do in this area. Do I enjoy my 2 year old asking to read a book or sit on my lap for the 100th time in a day or do I tell her no cause I want my space? Do I take advantage of the times my 6 year old is melting down over something little and actually wants to cuddle or just tell her it’s not that big of deal? Do I enjoy the times my 7 going on 17 year old actually wants to talk to me or do I just tell her not to be so dramatic? Do I choose the seat beside my husband at social gatherings for that extra time together or do I sit somewhere else and spend 5 extra minutes on my phone? Do I see every day as a blessing of time spent together or do I just get frustrated that I have 4-5 people that need me constantly for something all day long? My view of each of these things make a huge difference to how I deal with them and how I walk away from each day. Will I be tired and frustrated or tired but aware of how incredibly blessed I am that the Lord gave me these people to love, serve, and have invading my space for another day. So as we head in to 2020, may we all resolve to focus more on the blessings, to not take for granted each day we have with the ones we love. To be thankful for the dirty dishes, the 500 million “moms” a day, the not being able to go to the bathroom without someone coming in or knocking on the door 10 times. Lord, help me to be thankful in all things and not take one day for granted.

In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.
1 Thessalonians 5:18

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